How to be less distracted: Start by changing your relationship with distractions
I can bet anyone watching this blog will get distracted at least 3-4 times before even finishing it. And you know what, that is okay, it is normal! But we can shift this narrative of distraction.
Because you see, distraction is one of the main reasons we struggle to be more mindful and present in our everyday lives. Most people believe they can't be more mindful because of all of their external stimuli but the truth is if I put you in an empty room alone...you'd still be wildly distracted, with your thoughts.
What is distraction?
Thoughts just like distractions aren't something we can “get rid of”, but we can control our relationship with them. This analogy from my book explains it well…
Thoughts are like birds. You can’t keep them from flying around your head, but you can keep them from building nests in your hair. - Passage from my book, Trust The Flames.
How to be less distracted
We can learn how to manage our distractions in our day to day by setting ourselves up for success. I’ll show you exactly how to do that in my FREE Online Book Event.
I had never realized how much control I had over my thoughts, feelings and emotions. I found this intensely liberating and I breathed in that new sense of freedom a little more each day. - Passage from my book, Trust The Flames.
When I left New York City and traveled around busy vibrant Southeast Asia I eventually found myself in a silent meditation retreat where the only stimuli were my thoughts.
It was here that I realized you can never escape what is truly going on inside. Wherever you go, there you are.
The goal was to maintain the least number of distractions so you could do brain surgery without a scalpel. - Passage from my book, Trust The Flames.
What I didn’t realize until I attended something so stripped back as a silent meditation retreat, was just how distracting my thoughts were and how much distractions (particularly my thoughts) were a way for me to avoid, numb or neglect the present moment.
My mind was constantly wandering, in the past, the future, random thoughts etc, over and over again because that’s what the mind does. It is constantly thinking. At the time, I didn’t want to just “keep focusing on my breath.” That was boring, pointless and annoying.
However; the meditation retreat was training my brain to come back to the present moment over and over. It was building strength in my brain (the prefrontal cortex to be exact). This is Mindfulness training and it’s quite literally taking your 3 lb ball of muscle in between your ears to the gym.
For me, I needed to remove myself from the external chaotic stimuli to actually hear myself. I was never going to make the change I needed if I couldn't hear myself.... like really hear myself. That quiet all knowing voice we all have. Maybe you feel the same way at times.
But now I treat all the distractions just as I would a thought.
I slow down, pay attention to the present moment, notice what’s going on, and understand what is in my control and what’s not. Then from there make a decision, over and over. With as much self-awareness as I can. When I notice there is an unhelpful distraction I try to create a new habit so I can fire new neurons together. Ya know, rewire my brain because neuroplasticity is available to us all at any time!
The same behaviour creates the same results. If you want to change your personal reality, you must change your personality (what you think, feel and do). We don’t have a distraction crisis, we have a habits crisis. I’ll be going over my secret formula to creating new habits in my FREE Online Event.
Distractions are part of reality… but they don’t have to be a chronic lifestyle choice. Don’t let distractions build nests inside your hair.
Here are three actions you can take to go from mindlessness to mindfulness with distractions
(1) Three No No’s
Notifications
News
Phone before bed/ first thing in the morning
Get them out of your life. You do not “need” them and it is not “necessary” for healthy living. I’ll talk more about boundaries in my FREE ONLINE EVENT.
(2) Single Tasking
Multitasking is a myth. It does not create more efficient or effective homes or workplaces. If you are constantly distracted, challenge yourself with single-tasking. Completing an entire task before going on to the next one. Care chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, dishes etc. is an easy place to start.
(3) Slow Down
A prerequisite to single-tasking is of course…slowing down. Please slow down! You are only running to your grave faster. To speed up, you must slow down. This is not just a play on words.
By going quicker, you are less present and more likely to mess up, break something, drop something, forget something, etc. It's a known fact that rushing creates more accidents.
Unintentional injuries are ranked #4 of overall deaths in the USA. Slow down my friend, you’ll be able to create and stick with healthier habits when you do, I promise!
I’m going to share with you my exact formula on how to “Set yourself up for success” when it comes to distractions in my FREE Online Book Event. A mini celebration/ mini masterclass on February 27, 2024
Final thoughts
Emails, social media, notifications, links to other articles, videos that auto-start, a million windows open, devices that ding, buzz and flashlights, “likes” and companies who make money from this, offering rewards to all this behaviour. Then on top of that, we have other people, work and restless minds worrying about things we need to be doing blah blah blah.
We invite this constant stream of distraction into our lives happily every day, just because it’s normal doesn’t mean it’s healthy.
A mindful life doesn’t just go against the social norm but it will certainly challenge you every single day. It ain't for the faint-hearted, so my question to you is…Do you want distractions building nests inside your hair?
Let me show you how to be less distracted and get more done in my Free Online Book Event: How to go from Mindlessness to Mindfulness. Feb 27