How to be more mindful with time
I wonder if you can relate to this… go, go, go energy. Going to work, spending time with family, socializing with friends, going on holidays doing ALL the things but not making any quality time for yourself.
Like real quality alone time? You might often ask yourself: “How can I be more mindful of my time when I don’t have any left?”
Because you might not really be thinking that there could be another way. You are on a trying treadmill. Life is good, you're fine, nothing is necessarily wrong but life's just, well… a little unsustainable.
This was me in New York City. They say the city never sleeps. Well, can we talk about the girl who was always busy? It was fun. But yes, it was unsustainable and I was never thinking about the long term.
“I stayed for another year, despite everything inside of me telling me to “LEAVE NEW YORK.” I pushed those feelings down and continued my hedonistic lifestyle, doing the things I had become addicted to. Working. Traveling. Drinking. Drugs. Sex. I didn’t invent those self-destructive habits, but I certainly embraced them.
Being self-destructive in New York was like wearing a badge of honor. Everybody I knew was doing the same things. Nobody showed they cared. Nobody worried about the effect those behaviors were having on them. And being and doing everything was the way everyone I knew was living.” - Passage from my book, Trust The Flames.
In this article, I am going to share with you some personal experiences with time and mindfulness and give you three actions to help you be more mindful with your time.
Unpopular Opinion: Time is not the problem - your Attention is
Here is one action you can take to go from mindlessness to mindfulness with your time
Pay attention to the 4 golden W’s:
Who are you spending your time with?
What are you doing in 24 hours? And what is realistic?
Where are you wasting your time on time killers?
Why are you doing what you do?
I know this sounds super basic but trust me, if you have never sat down and taken an honest inventory, of course, you are going to feel like you don’t have time. You’re not being intentional!
In my FREE Online Book Event, I am going to break down the 4 W’s with easy mindfulness exercises and empowering questions that I wish I had known when I was living in New York City.
There was a core moment though, a life-changing moment for me that made me question a few things. Like, is this hustle culture we call normal…sustainable or my kind of normal? How much time and money am I spending on my own health? And if I don’t have much time left, what do I really want to do with my life?
“The world fell silent. I could hear the blood pounding in my ears. My mom had cancer. My strong, vibrant mom had cancer. How could that be? She was only 53.
“Do they know what kind, the diagnosis, next steps?” I asked finally. I looked down at my hand, white-knuckled on the counter’s edge. I’d forgotten where I was.
“Look honey, we aren’t sure about a lot of things and we’re still waiting for results to come back. We’ll see what the doctors say after more tests tomorrow.” - Passage from my book, Trust The Flames.
Not just the cancer diagnosis of my Mom redefined my relationship with time, but the whole process. From that moment to the last goodbye I said to her.
This is when I really started taking stock of where I was at, where I wanted to be and how I could better utilize the small amount of time I do have left on this planet.
Don’t be like me and wait for someone to die before you get clear on your values. Values were never something I valued before I started my healing journey. Values are what you must have in order to fully be who you are. Now I understand the value of values.
How you can start being more mindful of your time
Get clear on your top 5 values and use them as your guiding force!
*I’ll be sharing a list of values in my FREE Online Book Event and how to use them to guide your time.
My values are: Spirituality, Health, Honesty, Connection, Fun
*if I was allowed one more it would be Giving back
While my life was fun before all of this and from the outside perfectly normal. I had great friends, a great job, and family support. I traveled all over but if I was being honest (again that honesty thing) it wasn’t supporting the person I wanted to be in 5 or 10 years.
I didn’t want to spend my whole life living in the rat race, constantly chasing something I could never keep, and not prioritizing my values. I needed to shift. I needed to work out what it is I wanted long-term.
How could I live with more purpose and feel more content? What was my vision? What people, places and things would get me to where I wanted to be in the next 5 to 10 years?
Contemplate death every day! I know this sounds morbid and weird but it works. You will focus more on what’s important and less on what’s not. When I feel overwhelmed with time I think of this quote.
“In the end, there are only three things that matter most: How much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of what is not meant for you.” Buddha
Final thoughts
Stop holding yourself to unrealistic expectations with time! BE honest with yourself on what is attainable and sustainable for YOU, not for anyone else. There is a time for everything. A time to be happy and a time to be sad, a time to be in great health and time to be sick. You can’t be and do all the things at once and you wouldn’t want to. A big reason we feel like we don’t have enough time is because we are constantly trying to keep up with the Joneses.
Comparing ourselves to what other people are doing, achieving, accomplishing, making, etc. Always feeling behind. As if everyone is living some amazing life 24/7/365? Remember social media is a virtual reality and comparison is the thief of joy. It’s killing your time and energy! Stay in your own lane.
If you want to tackle the beast that is mindlessness to mindfulness but feel you need the inspiration to start, I have a special event to help you start the process of going from Mindlessness to Mindfulness!
Start feeling less stressed but more focused and self-compassionate.
Join us LIVE online on:
🇦🇺 Tues. Feb 27, 8:00 - 9:00 AM (AEST)
🇺🇸 Mon. Feb 26, 5PM (EST)