Want more confidence in 90 seconds?
"As counterintuitive as it may sound, the key to cultivating confidence and creating a life you love lies in the ability to handle unpleasant feelings."
Confidence isn't something you have or something you're born with. "It develops when you have the deep sense that you can handle the emotional outcome of whatever you pursue."
How long do you think emotions actually last?
minutes, hours, or sometimes even days!?
ERRRR -- WRONG!
It is scientifically proven that the chemical response in our body to any feeling /emotion is maximum 90 seconds (exception of trauma). It is our ruminating thought patterns that make them appear longer
I'm not discrediting feelings or thoughts, they are 100% real but just like everything in life, they pass and a lot quicker than we seem to believe
Unfortunately, most of us weren't taught, "How to deal” with our unpleasant emotions. We were probably told, "Oh you're fine," "Don't be so dramatic"
So one might ask: How exactly do I sit with these uncomfortable feelings?
and how do I get rid of those thoughts?
One word: Mindfulness and mindfulness will teach you that there is nothing to get rid of. Replace, sure but you're not broken. You are a human and happiness isn't the only emotion
The goal of mindfulness is to become aware of your thoughts and emotions and learn how to move through them without getting stuck
My quotes and inspiration in this email are taken from Dr. Joan Rosenberg's book 90 seconds to a Life You Love
As a psychologist in the field for over 35 years she said the #1 thing that holds people back is unpleasant feelings and her formula to break through them is below . "It's about awareness not avoidance"
The Rosenberg Reset
Make the choice to be present
To be aware and in touch with as much of your moment to moment experience as possible. When you make this choice, you open yourself up to encountering your whole range of feelings from pleasant to unpleasant
Acknowledge your willingness to deal with or tolerate the following 8 common unpleasant feelings:
Sadness
Shame
Helplessness
Anger
Embarrassment
Disappointment
Frustration
Vulnerability
You bear, move through or endure these feelings by riding one or more 90 second waves of bodily sensations
Physical sensations such as warm cheeks, pounding heart, pit in the stomach etc
Disconnect or distract from these experiences and you'll go through life feeling unfulfilled, knowing deep down something is missing
Connect to your moment to moment experience with the entire range of emotions